Essentials for Successful Endeavors and Wellbeing
I have met countless people, friends, partners that had a clear vision of the future, the life, the work they see themselves living, doing. Conversations revolve around these visions. While I am fascinated every time and listen closely, enjoying the sparks of enthusiasm, I see more than the drive and the joy of transforming and making something big happen. I observe that sometimes the present moment is sacrificed in exchange for a walk down the “lane of goals”. Often times, a whole lifetime is sacrificed to the effort of becoming educated enough, financially secure, independent and comfortable enough. Saying yes to jobs we don’t like and no to people we love along the way towards someday fulfilling our purpose and living in contentment. Achievements seem to be related to sacrifice and painful endurance. With a mind set on making a difference, no matter if only for ourselves, our family, or a whole society, we sometimes lose ourselves and endure stress, painful conditions, and ignore taking care of ourselves well.
It is a fine line between the “never enough”-driven greed and the genuine urge to do more. At the end of the day, they might be the same, born out of an insecurity. We feel inadequate and “not there yet”. That goes along with an absence of acceptance. The acceptance of where we are. Hand in hand with a lack of confidence, this makes it hard to move forward, to say no to what actually does not feel right and to say yes to love and support. To stick with clarity and authenticity to your vision and yet being open to the unpredictable flow of life and its opportunities. The result? We survive rather than live.
While I am convinced that every story including doubts and hardships is unique, there are two things I am just as convinced of that make a difference on the journey of creation. That are decisive in the long-term success of your endeavor and your long-term wellbeing.
Firstly, the relationship you lead with yourself. Knowing yourself can help you become more flexible when managing and facing challenges. Many would like to feel more balanced and understand their needs better, but are confused about where and how to start. I consider the first important step on this quest is identifying the stressors in your life (and getting to know yourself better). Ask yourself: what makes you feel exhausted? Irritable? Anxious? Helpless?
Determine the core of this stress by answering these questions. In consequence, you will be empowered to make changes where you can, limit time spent around what stresses you, make happy compromises or stop being involved with them completely. Change your habits.
And then, make space for your own remedies. The answer, your answer, to “what do I really enjoy spending my time with?”.
What do you like? What makes you feel energized, relaxed, calm, content? Adjust. You can be more centered on your endeavor and create more, work more efficiently and reach goals by decreasing your stressors and increasing your soul-soothing activities and habits in a way that works for you, for your schedule, your needs. Make conscious decisions for yourself. Schedule in time off - for yourself. Picking up a new hobby (what have you been interested in for a long time and never done?) can be indeed the key to your balance. Maybe it’s not another cup of coffee.
Acknowledge that you are just like a flower, a being of seasons. You bloom at times, at times you shed what’s not serving you, then you grow. This cannot be rushed. It is a process. Just as you need light and sun, warmth, activity, the doing, the waking hours full of work and connecting, taking part in life and your surroundings, giving energy to your fruits – your projects – requires you to rest. You need the rest of the night, the rain, and nourishment. The moving slowly. Contemplating. Listening closely. Knowing yourself, speaking the language of your Self.
The second thing I believe is decisive on the journey towards making your vision become reality is knowing the reason why you’re here. Ask yourself why. Why do you care about this vision? Why is this what you want to create? Do? Following the answers leads you to your purpose. Remind yourself of this every day. Draw it, say it, sing it. You can put it up on a wall or repeat it as your mantra. In the end, the why grounds you in your truth and ultimately your values, your worth, your all. It becomes a guide to fulfilling your dreams and to taking care of yourself along the way.